How I learned to fall in love with myself

November 21, 2016 • Vilma

over 3 mins


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Throughout my teenage years and early 20s, there were moments when I brought myself down due to body image issues and lack of self-confidence.  I had a tendency to compare myself to others causing me to love myself less. In high school, I compared my looks with other girls. In college, I compared myself to my peers who were hired by amazing startup companies as I was unemployed. By comparing myself to those around me, I multiplied my problems. My self-confidence dropped, and my feelings of jealousy, dislike, and unhappiness were at an all-time high.

These negative emotions were driving me to love myself less. I finally realized that for me to succeed, I needed to experience a paradigm shift. To accomplish this lifestyle change, I followed three basic tips that helped me get on the right track to falling in love with my true self.

Accepting my body

I try to stay in shape but unfortunately I am not blessed with a fast metabolism. If I eat that one piece of cheesecake,  I will gain weight. That’s why about three years ago, I decided to visit a nutritionist. I realized it was time to learn how to be healthy without depriving myself of sweets and other delicious food.  My nutritionist gave me the best advice “accept that your metabolism will always be slow, If you are aware of that you will learn to control yourself.” It’s all about accepting your body. I learned that if I want to keep my weight and still eat that cheesecake, I have to be conscious of my portion intake and exercise more often. After I had started educating myself about healthy habits and exercise, I started to fall in love with my body because I accepted myself.

Become your own BFF

It’s important to spend time with yourself because you learn more about your true feelings, desires, and goals. It’s hard to focus on yourself when you are surrounded by so many people and extensive to-do lists. Time is precious, and it’s okay to be selfish with your time. Unfortunately, most of us have limited time which is even more of a reason to be selective. I’ve noticed that my life has changed for the better once I started spending more time with myself. Being alone helped me find myself, and I’m getting to know myself better every day. I’m becoming my best friend.

Stop comparing yourself to others

I’m not going to lie; I still struggle with this. It’s hard nowadays not to compare your current life situation with others. It’s easy to feel depressed or discouraged by the Instagram posts of the latest Europe trip or engagement pic. It’s hard to see all your friends getting married or having babies as you’re sitting on your couch with a glass of wine trying to figure out your life. Outside of the social media realm, we compare ourselves in the workforce too. When everyone else gets that promotion, and you’re in the same position, it’s hard not to feel discouraged.

When I find myself in these situations, I have to snap myself out of it. I remind myself that everyone has their timeline in life. I may not be going on a trip to Europe, but hey I’ll save and travel when it’s right for me. I’m not getting married anytime soon, but it’s not my time to tie the knot because I have other things to accomplish. If I haven’t gotten that promotion, maybe it’s time to start voicing my skills and asking for the promotion because I deserve it.


When you start practicing these three simple tips, you will be amazed by how your self-view will change. Accept your body for all its beauty, be your best friend, and stop comparing yourself to others. Focus on yourself and all the good things you already are, not what you’re not because you are amazing!


Vilma Sierra

I studied Communications at Rider University in New Jersey and currently live & work in the Downtown New York/New Jersey...
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